youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Randomize