I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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