I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
