On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
