My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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