pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Randomize
