I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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