your thong is hanging out like whoa
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize