3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize