She said her name was "party"
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
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