she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Randomize
