batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
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