I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
