If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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