Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
smell my finger.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
