Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize