I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
