i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Just high enough for therapy.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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