I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
