he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Randomize
