Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Bring me that man meat
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
