OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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