Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize