i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
