Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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