Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
