this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Randomize