At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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