ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
that is very illegal...i love you.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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