Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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