i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
