Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize