perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
