Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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