Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize