I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Houston, we have a squirter
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
How does one acquire holy water?
Randomize
