I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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