put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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