I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
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