If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
No subtext here. People are naked.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
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