Sry I called you an 8
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
