btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Sacagawea was the original milf.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
