Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Randomize
