Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
