If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
