How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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