I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I have already put on my inside pants.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
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