Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
cat food counts as protein by the way
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize