There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
