i barfeds in our rink
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
