I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Found the puke drawer
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
